Monday, August 31, 2009

Just keep going...

It's right there, i can see it. I am so close to getting over this bridge that i have been on for a year and a half now. But it is taking forever. I am at the end here and i still have a some to go. I am actually really proud of myself right now, cause i have not lost it through all of this, but you know what?! I don't know how much longer i can last. I think it is because i have learned that if i need to cry, i cannot hold it in. And that's why I'm sitting here crying. Tomorrow is a new day, and i am going to try and make the most of it. I am going to try to smile every chance i can, and just take it hour by hour. I am going to the opening volleyball and football game, so hopefully that will get my mind off of things.

Friday, August 21, 2009


Oh My gosh, I love storms! I am sitting in my bed just listening to it! It really calmed me down after today. I walked my dogs when it was pouring and lightening, not such a good idea, but i didnt care, i wanted to get away!:) I wish it would storm forever:)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

New And Improved!!

Well, i am have been doing very well. I am happy all the time, i am not as loud. I don't thrive on always being the best or getting into trouble. I love who i have become, i am not sure if its the "old" me per say, but i love where i am at right at this moment. JROTC is really helping me too. I am getting help building my self esteem up and that's just what i need. I am learning new ways of doing things, and what is "right" My thinking was way off, what i thought was right was me just looking good in front of people and that's not it at all. I used to hate people asking me how i was cause they already knew the answer, but they asked anyways, Now when they ask, i love being able to say"I'm Fantastic!!" I don't know how i went through last year, but i know how I'm gonna get through this year, positively thinking and just being me:):)

Saturday, August 15, 2009

First week of High School! Wed-Fri

Well, okay the first day was FANFREAKINGTASTIC!. I had gotten my schedule changed from Teens N Teaching to what i had wanted, student aide. And that went great. It was fun! I was looking forward to that all year. But no, i had a feeling it wouldn't last long just because i had wanted it. So on Friday at lunch Mrs. Laluma, or Starita, or whatever her last name is, came up to me and was like Oh BTW, we are looking at your schedule and we are taking you out of your 1st hour cause we are not having him have two student aides in one hour. I was like WTF. I have already had my schedule changed twice and now you are gonna change it again? And she was like yeah. I was like but he had 2 aides last year 4th hour? And she said she didn't care its not gonna happen. So I'm kind of pissed at this point. Oh and she said maybe 2 of my classes are gonna change. That is bull. Who cares if he has 2 aides in one hour, it doesn't harm her. Ugh she makes me mad at times. Whatever, im going to my first hour, and if she remembers then she can come get me, I'm not going to go out of my way to make a change that i don't agree with so whatever! But I'm not going to let it bother me, I promised myself that whatever happens this year, i am gonna look past it and make it a good one. OMG ROTC is amazing! I love it! If i pass this test we have to take next week on a booklet we have to read, I get my uniform!!!! I'm super excited! I cant wait!!!